WHAT’S THE PROBLEM HERE?

Recently, my friend and I came across a blog about famous TV host Oprah Winfrey’s popular travel show, Oprah’s Next Chapter: India. [ http://www.firstpost.com/bollywood/you-still-eat-with-your-hands-oprahs-magical-mystery-tour-of-india-385494.html#.UA1IWi3T6dY.facebook ]

Yes, Oprah Winfrey; Billionaire philanthropist, magnanimous celebrity and a remarkable TV host. Yes, the gracefully poised, excellently empathetic and knowledgeably sensible Oprah Winfrey.

But reading the blog just left me reeling with shock, anger, hurt and disbelief.

You might ask, why? What’s the problem here?

Well, basically, the blog said that Oprah Winfrey, The Oprah Winfrey I should add, actually acted ignorant, myopic and insensitive towards not only the Indian culture, but also went ahead to reinforce the most exasperating stereotypes of the country, and then with all the magnanimity of a billionaire TV host from the West, proceeded to give a graciously sympathetic smack on the face of India’s underprivileged socioeconomic class.

Yes. The Oprah Winfrey.

Even though a range of reactive emotions flashed across my head as I read the post, I took my time and training into consideration: what if the person writing the blog was just an old misguided, cynical critic who liked to bash any good thing that ever happened? I mean there are no lack of such persons in the cyber world after all. So I went ahead to actually check out the episode with my own eyes before passing judgment. The result?

Shock, anger, hurt and disbelief.

The show was every bit offensive, ignorant, and misinformed as the blog had described it to be, if not more. Not only did it stink of Western “first world” privilege, but it also very meekly suggested, with amazingly flaunted emotions that how we Indians should actually be ashamed, horrified and sad about our “condition”. Yes, the show did broadcast many problems within the Indian society, which we Indians are very well aware of. Yes, it did try to showcase the vast and unimaginable cultural, socioeconomic, religious, ethnic and geographic diversity in India. But, it unfortunately lost the most vital essence of “an experience in India”- respect.

I will be honest, as I watched the show unfold, I was forced to remember the countless stereotypes I have personally faced as an International student in the United States. Every time Oprah asked the underprivileged family she visited, “how it felt to be in such a condition?” [yes, she did ask that!] I recalled the shocking resemblance to the repeated questions people asked me, “Is India really like Slumdog Millionaire”, or “Do you have electricity” or the best one, “How does it feel like living in India?” And the tone of almost a pitiful sympathy that accompanies these questions, just like it accompanied Oprah’s dialogue, is nauseatingly uneasy. I mean, really?! What do you even mean by asking a person from an underprivileged family, “how does it feel to live like this?” or asking a person from India, “How does it FEEL living in India?

Are you honestly asking someone how they FEEL living in their home, or in my case, their motherland??!

But yes, this does happen, has happened and I am sure will happen with me again; just like Oprah, some other “sympathetic” person will inevitably ask this question.

If this was not enough, Oprah went on to point out to the family that was hosting her how miserable their lives were, and how they should be feeling extremely sad and helpless right now; in fact, she actually went to their bathroom [yes, talk about breach of privacy here] and exclaimed, “you don’t have shower heads?!” And when the person giving her the tour explained that they used buckets instead, she demonstrated dramatic shock and nearly gasped in a show of privileged horror.

Why does this bother me?

…just a few months ago, a similar thing had happened when someone reeling in exquisite shock and surprise, shouted “you use buckets at home??!” at me, even after I explained that though my bathroom at home has showerheads, my parents sometimes preferred using buckets since that was a part of our cultural upbringing. But instead of understanding the cultural relevance here, I was hit with a wave of sympathetic disgust from this fellow student; not only was that incident deeply hurtful and embarrassing for me since I was surrounded by other friends, it also reeked of economic, or more appropriately, “first world” privilege. So yes, when Oprah Winfrey said those words to that family, I could not help but feel majorly pissed off because I connected…

Throughout her show, and throughout her interactions, Oprah point blank refused to acknowledge the strength, resilience and happiness exuded by the people she met. When the little girl, from the family she was visiting in the slum spoke about how happy she was living in that small house, Oprah simply chose to wave that off and proceeded to ask more humiliating questions. Not once did she acknowledge the smartness of that 11 or 12 year girl who handled herself with such extraordinary poise but instead chose to focus on the perceived “miserable condition” of the family.

I will not go into details about the show, but I will just say that when an international celebrity like Oprah chooses to say, “You STILL eat with your hands?” without even attempting to understand the culture behind it, or chooses to openly question the validity of arranged marriages to women who have been married for years now and asks them painfully stupid questions like, “are you happy with your life?”, it just hits you with a surge of disappointment. Every culture in the world is different, and if you don’t understand it, it is okay to be inquisitive, but it is NEVER okay to be disrespectful. I am tired of seeing myself, my culture and even my country being ridiculed at the expense of a Western idea of a utopian society. As my friend Neeraj accurately explained, “In a world where people call you oversensitive for standing up for something that offends you – nay, being mature and knowing enough to understand when something crosses the line – I say that this (India) series is practically overflowing with stereotypes and the sense of Privilege so-called ‘developed’ nations think they have over nations like mine, India.”

Yes, Oprah has not only disappointed me, my friends and numerous other educated Indians, both in the US and back in India, who were perhaps her fans and admirers, she has also depicted how a single seed of ignorance can be more hurtful than a plethora of curses. I just request any person reading this post that if you ever feel the need to question, inquire or interact with any culture, experience, faith, ethnicity or social class drastically different from yours, do so with a willingness to learn, understand and empathize. You have the right to your opinion and your thoughts, but remember that we too have the right to ask for respect, dignity and understanding instead of ignorance, insensitivity and sympathy.

Hoping for a more sensible, empathetic and respectful world,

Prithak

p.s- Feel free to look up that particular episode in the Internet. Maybe you will understand why me and my friends are so pissed off.